Anonymous

I love these empty, lonely, melancholic nights where I listen to light music and think of the worst things possible, sure they are unhealthy for me but they remind me what I’m doing wrong, that I’m wasting my youth by sitting all day at home being lazy, or that I should work on myself, strengthen my skills, get an internship. And I wanna do all that but I’m just too lazy. And when I see other friends, even close ones doing better than me, I feel like I’m not truly happy for them cause I’m not doing good myself. That’s rude and selfish and whatnot and I try my best to fight it.

I’m meeting her again this Sunday and I’m so nervous and anxious about it cause it’s after a long time, I’m worried if everything would go alright and if there’d be any awkward moments or anything. She’s not my girlfriend or anything but we are really close and comfortable with each other. And even being comfortable, I am still nervous and anxious.

I just said so many unrelated things lmao